The Comparison Game

Comparison. We all do it. We compare how we look with how others look. We compare how we’re dressed with how other’s are dressed. We compare cars, homes, kids, talents…you name it, we compare it.

In recent years, the tendency to compare has become even greater with the sharing of our “highlight reels” on social media. Honestly, sometimes it’s not even the highlights of one’s life, it’s completely fictitious but played off as reality. And we buy it. And we compare our “whatever” to it.

It’s so easy to get discouraged and feel defeated when we get caught up in the comparison trap. It makes it easy to focus on what we lack than what we have. We start to focus on our flaws instead of what makes us unique and beautiful and special. We don’t see the good anymore, we start to see what needs to be changed, improved.

When I was bodybuilding, comparison was part of the game. You’re constantly sizing up the competition and wondering if you look better or worse. Backstage, I remember looking at the other girls in my glass and thinking…”her delts are way bigger and better than mine”…or whatever the body part was (usually abs or delts, because those are my weak spots). Before I even walked on stage it would be easy to feel like I had already been beat. And then you get up on stage in a line with other girls where you are being compared by a panel of judges. It is like comparison on steroids. Pun intended.

Months of blood, sweat and tears were defeated in one moment backstage where I gave into the temptation to compare. That may be part of the “game” when it comes to something like bodybuilding, but let’s face it, it’s part of the game we all play in everyday life. All. The. Time.

Comparison is probably the biggest cause of defeat in our lives. It decreases our value and our worth and it increases our perceived flaws. When we’re caught up in the comparison game, we aren’t focused on our own goals and dreams. We are too caught up with trying to figure out how to catch up with whoever we are comparing ourselves to…and then we’re stuck.

How do we avoid comparison? Stay in your own lane! Keep your eyes on your own paper! Resist the temptation to compare your progress to someone else’s, or your life, things, kids, careers, finances to someone else’s. Each of our paths is unique and different and we all are created for a unique purpose. We don’t need to compare ourselves to others…that’s like comparing apples to oranges.

The constant need to compare myself to other women is one of the primary reasons I got out of bodybuilding. I couldn’t stop myself from doing it, so I removed myself from the situation. It wasn’t helping me make progress in my life. Maybe you need to take a look at situations that cause you to compare - do you need to take a break or spend less time on social media? Do you need to change your circle of friends and surround yourself with people we appreciate you the way you are and encourage you to be the best YOU?

“We won’t be distracted by comparison if we are captivated with purpose.”

-Bob Goff